{"product_id":"vibes-based-watering-schedule-funny-plant-parent-tee","title":"Schedule: Vibes-Based","description":"\n\n\u003cp style=\"font-family:'Space Grotesk',system-ui,sans-serif;font-size:18px;line-height:1.45;letter-spacing:-0.005em;font-weight:500;color:#0A0A0A;margin:0 0 32px;\"\u003e\nFor the person whose calendar is more of a suggestion than a plan.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3 style=\"font-family:'JetBrains Mono',ui-monospace,monospace;font-size:11px;letter-spacing:0.12em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#0A0A0A;opacity:0.6;margin:0 0 12px;font-weight:500;\"\u003eThe thought\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"font-family:'Inter',system-ui,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:1.65;color:#0A0A0A;margin:0 0 32px;max-width:60ch;\"\u003e\nYou watered on Tuesday because the soil looked like it needed it. You repotted in November because the roots were asking. There is no app for this. There is no recurring reminder. The plant tells you when, and somehow you hear it. Everyone else is optimizing their mornings. You're standing in the kitchen at 7am, rotating a pot toward the light, operating on a frequency that doesn't have a name yet.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3 style=\"font-family:'JetBrains Mono',ui-monospace,monospace;font-size:11px;letter-spacing:0.12em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#0A0A0A;opacity:0.6;margin:0 0 12px;font-weight:500;\"\u003eThe object\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"font-family:'Inter',system-ui,sans-serif;font-size:15px;line-height:1.65;color:#0A0A0A;margin:0 0 32px;max-width:60ch;\"\u003e\nMid-weight 230 gsm 100% cotton, garment-dyed for the slight wash that says owned, not bought. Boxy fit — size up if you're between sizes. Screen-printed in small lots, plastisol ink. The print will soften with the shirt over time. That's not a defect. Ships from a US partner, tracked, within five days domestically. EU delivery runs 7–14 days. Each lot prints once.\n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul style=\"font-family:'JetBrains Mono',ui-monospace,monospace;font-size:12px;line-height:1.8;letter-spacing:0.04em;list-style:none;padding:0;margin:24px 0 0;border-top:1px solid #0A0A0A;padding-top:16px;color:#0A0A0A;\"\u003e\n  \u003cli style=\"margin:6px 0;\"\u003e230 gsm cotton, garment-dyed.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"margin:6px 0;\"\u003eBoxy fit. Size up if between.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"margin:6px 0;\"\u003eScreen-printed, small US lots.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"margin:6px 0;\"\u003eEach lot prints once.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Nicaragua\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":47253554725041,"sku":"18098935982140158999","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":47253554757809,"sku":"13992484936153454064","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":47253554790577,"sku":"15098538785692085197","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":47253554823345,"sku":"13880665891547801274","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":47253554856113,"sku":"84269560360387010905","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":47253554888881,"sku":"31585405372603999298","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":47253554921649,"sku":"19722305407860968043","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":47253554954417,"sku":"18365585161944358217","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":47253554987185,"sku":"23554149608293562928","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":47253555019953,"sku":"31739500444788233429","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":47253555052721,"sku":"85108757952114321584","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":47253555085489,"sku":"25826840371298221229","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0736\/0243\/3201\/files\/3966797114643722118_2048.jpg?v=1779344748","url":"https:\/\/loosethreads.shop\/products\/vibes-based-watering-schedule-funny-plant-parent-tee","provider":"Loose Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}